“It’ll be OK”. “Everything will work out for the best.” “You’ll be just fine.” How often do we quickly utter these words to comfort ourselves or someone else? How do we really know it’ll be ok? Are we (at least on some subconscious level) simply reassuring ourselves that whatever happens won’t break us?
Now I know that is a tough paragraph to grasp, so feel free to read it over a few times out loud. Do we ever really know anything? Can we be sure? I know for me indecision and being stuck is often the result of fear. Fear of the unknown. “What if?” And as any good therapist will tell you, you could “what if” yourself to death and never do a blessed thing with your life because you’re too afraid and panic stricken to act.
What got me thinking about this topic once again was the death of the beloved character Dana Fairbanks on The L Word. Yes, I know it is just a television show, and no one need remind me that at the end of the day the actress got up, went home, and moved on with her career. However, if art imitates life and a drama is meant to affect you as it tells real-life stories in its own unique way, why shouldn’t I be affected by it? Isn’t that a measure of success in the creative medium - the emotional impact it has on people?
For those of you not familiar with the story, Dana was a super-healthy, professional athlete who finds a lump in her breast, undergoes a mastectomy, and goes through chemotherapy. While she appears to be recovering (and all odds say she should recover fully), her chemo-weakened immune system succumbs to an infection and she dies at the ripe young age of 32 a few weeks after her surgery.
What continues to strike me about this story, beyond the obvious, was the dialogue along the way between her and those who loved her. Whether it is her lover telling her “it’ll be ok” or good friends saying “she’ll be fine” or even the character herself making plans for her comeback, it begged the question in my mind as they said it - how do you know that?? Lest you think I am a hopeless pessimist, keep in mind I spent most of my life and upbringing partaking in left-brain pursuits. Everything follows logic, formulas, and expected outcomes. As I’ve come to learn over the years, real life surely throws rain on that expectation parade. So, I’m not pessimistic, only overly analytical!
This left me with the stunning conclusion - no one really knows! That’s right, not me, not you, and not the person sitting next to you. We just don’t know for sure what any outcome will be or even if we’ll be alive tomorrow. In Raphael Cushnir’s book Setting Your Heart on Fire: The Seven Invitations to Liberate Your Life, he incites us to “Live Like You’re Dying”. He challenges the reader to be conscious of the fact that death may be around the corner and make peace with it. Who knows, maybe today is your day. In a carpe diem sort of way he invites us to use this knowledge to free us from the doubt, fear, and distraction that keeps most of us from living each day fully.
It Is All OK
I think the biggest lesson in all this is - whatever happens is OK. Even the things that don’t seem are simply part of life’s experiences OK (let’s face it, who wants a loved one to be ill or die). Sometimes life’s experiences are grand, sometimes tragic, and oftentimes somewhere in between. We experience them, and then move through them in whatever way we need to. It is only when we let fear of the unknown paralyze us that it is really not ok.
Don’t Wait
Someday is not a day on the calendar. So, for all those things you say you’ll do “someday”, start penciling them in. Don’t wait until it is too late to do what you say you want to do. Start with the following exercise:
- Make a list of 100 things you most want to do in your lifetime
- Write down the names of all the people you love and care deeply about
Starting today, tell each of those people you love them. Call them up, write a letter, or drop by, but simply tell them how you feel. Don’t assume they already know. Even if they do know, it is always nice to hear! You never know when the day will come that you won’t have that opportunity, so seize it.
Then, read through your list of 100 things you want to do and start doing some of them. Start planning the big ones. Throw caution to the wind and do some of the less-involved ones right away. The only way they will ever become reality is if you make them a priority and just do it.
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Copyright 2006, The Paula G Company
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Paula Gregorowicz is the owner of The Paula G Company which specializes in helping stressed out and overwhelmed women business owners achieve more success without all the burnout and compromise. If you are a lesbian businss owner and professional, visit the new http://www.Coaching4Lesbians.com community for free resources. If you are finding yourself stressed out or overwhelmed , check out the burnout busting eCourse “Nip Burnout in the Bud” available at http://www.avoidburnoutnow.com and the “Beyond Burnout” newsletter at http://www.thepaulagcompany.com
There are a number of benefits which may be associated with re-financing a home. While there are some situations where re-financing is not the right decision, there are a host of benefits which can be gained from re-financing under favorable conditions. Some of these benefits include lower monthly payments, debt consolidation and the ability to utilize the existing equity in the home. Homeowners who are considering re-financing should consider each of these options with their current financial situation to determine whether or not they wish to re-finance their home.
Lower Monthly Payments
For many homeowners the possibility of lower monthly payments is a very appealing benefit of re-financing. Many homeowners live paycheck to paycheck and for these homeowners finding an opportunity to increase their savings can be a monumental feat. Homeowners who are able to negotiate lower interest rates when they re-finance their home will likely see the benefit of lower monthly mortgage payments resulting from the decision to re-finance.
Each month homeowners submit a mortgage payment. This payment is typically used to repay a portion of the interest as well as a portion of the principle on the loan. Homeowners who are able to refinance their loan at a lower interest rate may see a decrease in the amount they are paying in both interest and principle. This may be due to the lower interest rate as well as the lower remaining balance. When a home is re-financed, a second mortgage is taken out to repay the first mortgage. If the existing mortgage was already a few years old, it is likely the homeowner already had some equity and had paid off some of the previous principle balance. This enables the homeowner to take out a smaller mortgage when they re-finance their home because they are repaying a smaller debt than the original purchase price of the home.
Debt Consolidation
Some homeowners begin to investigate re-financing for the purpose of debt consolidation. This is especially true for homeowners who have high interest debts such as credit card debts. A debt consolidation loan enables the homeowner to use the existing equity in their home as collateral to secure a low interest loan which is large enough to repay the existing balance on the home as well as a number of other debts such as credit card debt, car loans, student loans or any other debts the homeowner may have.
When re-financing is done of the purpose of debt consolidation there is not always an overall increase in savings. Those who are seeking to consolidate their debts are often struggling with their monthly payments and are seeking an option which makes it easier for the homeowner to manage their monthly bills.
Additionally, debt consolidation can also simplify the process of paying monthly bills. Homeowners who are apprehensive about participating in monthly bill pay programs may be overwhelmed by the amount of bills they have to pay each month. Even if the value of these bills is not worrisome just the act of writing several checks each month and ensuring they are sent, on time, to the correct location can be overwhelming. For this reason, many homeowners often re-finance their mortgage to minimize the amount of payments they are making each month.
Using the Existing Equity in the Home
Another popular reason for re-financing is to use the existing equity in the home. Homeowners who have a considerable amount of equity in their home may find they are able to cash out some of this equity for other purposes. This may include making improvements to the home, starting a business, taking a dream vacation or pursuing a higher degree of education. The homeowner is not limited in how they can use the equity in their home and may re-finance a home equity line of credit which can be used for any purpose imaginable. A home equity line of credit is different from a loan because the funds are not disbursed all at once. Rather the funds are made available to the homeowner and the homeowner can withdraw these finds at anytime during the draw period.
Continue here - steps in refinancing mortgage and singlewide mobile home refinancing.
So, you have decided to indulge in candle making using soywax. Go ahead and enjoy. It is a good indulgence that will give you immense joy and new experience every time. However, you should know a few things and take certain precautions.
Things you should know
First and foremost, register in your mind that all soy wax is not the same. Your soy wax candle making will vary depending on the temperature requirements of the manufacturer of soy wax. Soy wax is different, so you must check the recommended temperatures for different soy wax for candle making.
Precaution to be taken
Always remember that electronic equipment and soy wax can not be together. Rather,to put it straight, soy wax, or any wax for that matter,is really quite dangerous for your expensive equipment and must not be kept away from your equipment.
There are different techniques to make your candles stand out from the crowd. You can use labels,ribbons,stickers and even charms to the containers. Such additions will also make your product look exciting.
Continue here –
soy wax scented tealight candle
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